Culture

KRIS (Caller): Thank you. I was wondering - I'm 62 years old, and when I was in high school, I didn't even know what marijuana was. And I'm wondering why is it so rampant now, and it never used to be?

Mr. KERLIKOWSKE: Well, I wish I had a good answer for that, Rachel. I am - I actually just about two years younger than you are, and so I'm afraid I would put myself in exactly the same mindset. But I think that marijuana is popularized on television shows. It is popularized in media. There is only one antidrug media message out there, and that's the one that the Office of the National Drug Control Policy actually funds, and that - the antidrug.com…

TO: All CU-Boulder Students
FROM: Office of the Chancellor
DATE: April 15, 2009
SUBJECT: A statement from the CU-Boulder leadership to CU Students on the 4-20 gathering

Dear Students:

As another April 20 approaches, we are faced with concerns from students, parents, alumni, Regents, and community members about a repeat of last year’s 4/20 “event.”

Let us start by saying that we share their concerns. A gathering of thousands on our campus for the sole purpose of engaging in unlawful activity is contrary to everything that CU-Boulder stands for and is in no way condoned. This event only serves to harm the reputation of this great university and is comprised in large part of individuals with no investment in the university at all.

The increasingly large crowds that have gathered in recent years present safety risks for participants, whether students or people not affiliated with the campus. This activity violates a number of campus regulations designed to provide for the well-being of our campus and neighboring community.

On April 20, 2009, we hope that you will choose not to participate in unlawful activity that debases the reputation of your University and degree…[CelebStoner]

Editor's Note: Amanda B. Shaffer is an intern at StoptheDrugWar.org. Her bio is in our "staff" section at http://stopthedrugwar.org/about/staff

As Scott yesterday blogged, this past Wednesday Comedy Central aired an episode about children getting high off of cat urine resulting in the banning of cats in Southpark. The DEA gets called in to enforce the ban. At the end of the episode, Gerald (the man who leads a fight to prohibit cats) gets high himself off of cat urine. After being caught, he publicly states cats should once again be legal because “Cats aren’t the problem, we are the problem.”

The cat urine episode is based, in part, on reports that surfaced a few months ago about kids saving human feces, fermenting it, and then inhaling the gasses to get high. The show referred to the squirting of cat urine in one’s face as “cheesing,” likely a send-up of a hybrid drug that involves mixing heroin with over-the-counter cold tablets such as Tylenol PM. The mixture is snorted rather than injected like pure heroin.

The message here is that some kids will get high. If illegal drugs are inaccessible, curious youths will find other ways to alter their consciousness. Clearly outlawing cats is just as absurd as outlawing human feces.

However, this is not the first Southpark episode to deal with drugs, and I doubt it will be the last. The first episode concerning drugs was in season 4 entitled “Timmy 2000.” The episode discussed the overprescribing of prescription drugs to children, specifically Ritalin. In 2000, the overprescribing of Ritalin (a drug used for ADD) became a nation-wide concern. Southpark broached the subject by showing how dull all of the kids became when they took it, eventually landing them at a Phil Collins concert. A remedy made by Chef removed the Ritalin from their systems, and the children then realized that they openly chose to go an extremely lame concert.

A few episodes feature the character Towelie. Towelie is an engineered smart towel that appears whenever the boys’ conversation involves water. Towelie is known for always wanting to get high. But every time he does he runs into some sort of trouble. Mostly he forgets what he is doing or comes up with a bad idea. It seems to me that Stone and Parker use the Towelie character to illustrate that marijuana isn’t harmful; it just can make one forgetful sometimes and possibly leave one unable to decipher good ideas from the bad ones.

2004: the year steroid controversy engulfed the sports world and Southpark’s “Up and Down Steroid” aired. The episode depicted the dangers of using steroids when Jimmy turns to them to win top athlete in the Special Olympics. In the end Jimmy wins the honor of top athlete, breaking many Special Olympic records along the way, but also hurting the ones he loves. Eventually, guilt overcomes him, and Jimmy returns the medal presented to him by baseball superstars (and notorious steroid users) Mark McGuire, Jason Giambi, and Barry Bonds. He follows with a speech, stating that “Taking steroids is like pretending to be handicapped at the Special Olympics because you are taking all of the fairness out of the game.” Once again Parker and Stone brilliantly brought to light a serious and adverse issue.

During the same season, Southpark aired the episode “Quest for Ratings,” which depicted the dangers of cough medication (at least those containing dextromethorphan). Misinformed, some of the students drink cough syrup in order to come up with creative ideas to boost ratings for the Southpark Elementary’s News Show. After waking up with a hangover and without any ideas, the boys realize the dangers of cough medicine and agree to report on the use going on in school. They learned that getting high doesn’t necessarily aid in the creation of masterpieces; it isn’t until they are sober that the clever idea is thought up.

I am ecstatic that a popular television show continues to cleverly address drug issues. The show is truthful and is able to attract a large audience, and at the end of the episodes one of the children usually makes a speech about what was learned from all the crazy antics.

Kudos to Southpark for standing above the crowd.

Seriously, just don't. Because if you mention drugs to children for any purpose other than to terrify them, you'll make national news for being a bastard.

That's exactly what happened to a high school teacher in New Mexico who mentioned meth on a math test. From KOB-TV.com:

Teacher Will Klundt’s question reads: “Smoky J. sells meth. Smoky’s source says he has to sell a G’s worth of meth by the end of the month. If Smoky sold $245 the first week and $532 the second week, how much money must Smoky still make if he wants to avoid the beat down from his connection?”

...

[Moriarty High School Principal] Marshall refused to discuss what, if any, disciplinary action will be or has been taken against Klundt.

Could this be because there isn't yet a rule against innocuous acknowledgements that drug dealers exist? Surely the school board must now convene to determine the appropriate sanction for teachers who mention drugs without adding, in the same breath, that they'll turn you into a walking freak show. This is necessary, because the hippies that pass for teachers these days aren’t worth the aluminum it takes to roll 'em out of town in a trashcan.

Meanwhile, the American Medical Association thinks that movies should be rated 'R' if they depict smoking. They got the idea from a study showing that kids who watch movies are more likely to smoke, or some such nonsense. I don't know. I refuse to even read that crap.

You could write a book about how stupid this is, consisting mostly of long chapters listing activities more dangerous than smoking that are allowed in 'PG' movies. But it's preferable to censorship for those of us old enough to watch whatever movies we want. I'd rather watch I Love Lucy on the Playboy Channel than have to explain to a child why Ricky Ricardo's hand is blurry all the time.

The 'slippery slope' problem presents itself here, but this level of hysteria is typically reserved for drugs, sex, and trans fats. To its credit, NPR gave airtime this morning to the idea that excessive eating is just as deserving of an 'R' rating as cigarette smoking. I grinned for a moment, but then paused to wonder if maybe they should shut up about that.

From the creators of a blog that no one reads, and podcasts that no one listens to, comes…

…Youtube videos that no one watches!

That’s right folks, ONDCP has created a Youtube profile and it’s about as cool as you might expect. The page includes several of ONDCP’s ads (you know, the ones that were proven to cause drug use), but for ONDCP super-fans there’s also a 3-part series featuring Drug Czar John Walters talking from behind a podium somewhere.

It’s delightfully ironic that, after a barrage of bad publicity, ONDCP has attempted to redeem its ads by placing them in an online popularity contest. Success on Youtube has much to do with viewer ratings, and after only one day, ONDCP’s ratings are as low as the system permits (note: ratings appearing in the user profile linked above are only updated periodically. You have to click on one of the videos to see how bad the ratings have gotten).

Delightfully smug sex columnist Dan Savage got stoned and walked into Seattle’s City Hall with a fake gun and bag full of pot cookies. For all the right reasons.

It all started when Seattle Mayor Greg Nickels proposed a wildly impractical ordinance which would hold nightclub owners responsible for any drug possession on their premises: